Loop

In loop

The terrible self

I struggle with

The same old story 

The same old sorry 

In loop 

I met the same human

I heard the same praise

I faced the same emotion

I received the same blow

And left alone in the path of guilt

In loop

'I like that you are honest'

'It's not your fault for being innocent'

'I think you are a bit ignorant'

'Why don't you care enough'

'Why can't you give as much as you receive'

I am sorry

I am sorry because I find it hard to love

I am sorry for being selfish

God 

I wish I misunderstood

I wish I had a history

I wish I had a mental issue 

To explains, my act was not by my means 

And some short circuit in my brain was to blame

Therefore in a while

I can swim to the surface and breathe 

Before I drown in self-hatred

So in loop

I apologize

I retract my hand

I battle the loneliness

Because I wish pain upon no one